


Soulbond

by ohmyheichou



Series: Kink Meme Fills [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Community: snkkink, Kink Meme, M/M, but it is not this day, i'll decide someday, their relationship may or may not be platonic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-23
Updated: 2014-06-12
Packaged: 2018-01-26 05:23:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1676306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmyheichou/pseuds/ohmyheichou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren has always heard a voice in his mind. He loves and admires the man he hears.</p><p>Levi, on the other hand, just thinks he's going crazy.</p><p>**ON HIATUS**</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fight

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fill for a kink meme prompt, which you can find at http://snkkink.dreamwidth.org/2848.html?thread=3587104#cmt3587104.

_**1**_  
Eren hears someone crying, and even though he’s too young to understand much of anything, he understands crying, so he cries along with the person. Carla and Grisha don’t know why he’s crying, and nothing they do can stem his tears.

 

 _ **3**_  
Eren still hears the voice in his head, and he tries to answer, babbling in a relatively incomprehensible language that only children of that age can really understand. _No cry_ , he says. _Stop_ , he says. The person must not hear him because he continues crying, and Carla casts him worried glances and speaks with Grisha in hushed tones at night, as though Eren can understand what she says. He can’t, of course. He understands little other than that while he is happy, the voice in his head is not, and that makes him sad. He wants the voice to be happy, just like him.

 

 _ **5**_  
He hears the voice screaming insults in his head. _Cocksucker,filthybastards,youscum,Ihateyouall, hatehatehatehate,those fuckingimbeciles, goddamn shitstains._ He doesn’t know what most of them mean, but he can hear the pain and the rage just fine, and he knows that the insults are the person’s ineffectual way of fighting back. Against what he doesn’t really know, because he’s never once seen this person. He still tries to talk to the person, but he must not hear Eren, because there is never a response. Eren wants desperately to understand this person, to take away his hatred, so he tries asking his mother some questions.

“Mom, what’s an im-be-si-lo?”  
“Eren! That’s not a nice word!”

Carla doesn’t help him much, and nothing he says makes the person stop screaming.

 

 _ **7-8-9**_  
As Eren grows older, he comes to understand the person a little better. He understands that while he is happy with his life, safe with his parents, not everyone else is. He understands that this person does not have parents to feed and clothe him, that this person fights a daily war just to live, that this person fights against the entire world in his struggle to survive. _Goddamnthosepigs,fuckit,thisworldisshit._ It is from the voice in his head that Eren first understands that there are monsters in human form - people who would oppress other people for no good reason at all. It is from the voice in his head that Eren first tastes the fury that comes with helplessness, and it is from the voice in his head that Eren first feels the righteous anger that will come to define him in his later years. He is too young and too weak to help this person or to change the world, but he vows to help the oppressed, and he doesn’t hesitate to fight the bullies that plague Armin. He’s old enough now to understand that the voice in his head isn’t anywhere nearby, so he tries to speak to him with his mind instead.

_Please don’t be sad.  
There are good people in the world too._

The voice never replies to him, but that doesn’t deter him. Eren is known more for his stubbornness than his rationality, after all. He holds entire conversations (one-sided, of course) with this voice in his head, sometimes worrying Armin and Carla, both of whom will attempt to talk to him only to realize that his attention is elsewhere.

_The bullies were bothering Armin again today, but I beat them! Hey, Mister, you’re beating your bullies too, right? I don’t really know you, but you sound strong to me…_

Eren’s sense of justice is strongly influenced by this voice in his head, and his desire to go outside the walls had as much to do with the thought that _we were born free_ as with Armin’s dream to see the ocean. It’s his sense of justice that leads him to fight Armin’s bullies, and it’s also what drives him to save Mikasa, who loves him with all her heart from that moment onwards. Eren’s fondest wish is to be able to protect his two precious friends (though Mikasa is the one who ends up protecting him and Armin).

As Eren grows older, the voice in his head gets quieter. Not weaker, exactly, because the voice sounds as strong as ever to Eren, but quieter. He naively thinks that the person is happier and thinks wistfully, _maybe he can visit the ocean with us_. He has yet to taste the bitterness of loss in his short, happy life, and thus does not catch onto the bitterness and weariness in the person’s voice.

 

 _ **10-11**_  
In the chaos that results from the appearance of the Colossal Titan, Eren does not notice the absence of the voice. He tastes the first bitter drops of anguish and hatred when his mother is eaten by a Titan, and his overwhelming grief drowns out all else. As he is carried away from his home, his grief turns to rage, his hatred begins to poison his mind, and his childhood dream changes to something much darker. When his mind begins to clear, he realizes that he has not heard the voice for awhile now. He doesn’t know when it stopped, but he knows that the person must have died in the attack. There can be no other explanation. Bitter, bitter grief claws at his mind, and he retreats into himself, where no one can see him cry for this person he has never even met. When he and his friends enroll in the military, he vows to become an outstanding soldier, one who will slaughter humanity’s oppressors, down to the very last Titan, in memory of the man he heard in his heart for ten years.

 

 _ **15**_  
He wakes up in a dungeon, his arms in chains. As his blurry vision comes into focus, he recognizes the man on the left (Commander Erwin Smith) and the man on the right - humanity’s strongest soldier. The face he’s seen return from beyond the walls time and time again, but his head, logical for once in his life, can’t process the voice, until he hears it speak in tandem with the one in his heart. _Not bad._


	2. Crybaby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Levi is hard for me to understand, so I apologize in advance if he is OOC.  
> Also this is really short :/

_**258**_  
Sometime during his already shitty life, Levi starts hearing things. At first, he doesn’t really notice.  
After all, everyone cries here, whether it’s for themselves or the people they ~~love~~ loved, and Levi has long since grown immune to the wailing of starving children and the pitiful cries of despairing prostitutes. He cries, too, sometimes, but he tries not to think about it. In the same way, he ignores the signs that he might be crazy. He already has enough to deal with.

 

_**372**_  
Crying babies may be common in the Underground, but after awhile the crying babies evolve into just one child, and Levi can’t ignore it anymore. It’s always the same voice, and the child talks to Levi the way one might talk to a comatose person: familiar, a conversation without the expectation of a response. The only thing the kid’s missing is the sadness that usually plagues relatives of a comatose piece of shit. No, this child is always happy, optimistic, and Levi can appreciate that optimism in a vague sort of way. Children deserve to be happy, even if Levi wasn’t.

 

_**401**_  
Levi despises the Military Police, and he despises the pigs disguised known as merchants and noblemen. He hates them with a viciousness that curls deep inside his stomach and burns through his veins. He wishes he was strong enough to destroy them all, but for now he does what he can. His friends are safe, and he is safe, and that is all that matters. But still, he hates.

 

_**537**_  
Levi has no friends in the Scouting Legion. He doesn’t want any, and he doesn’t need any, or so he says to Hange and Erwin. Truthfully, he’s already lost his closest friends, and nothing can fill that hole, especially not soldiers who fall like leaves in autumn. Hange might be annoying, but she always comes back, and he can admit that he’s grateful for that. In private, anyway.

 

_**602**_  
He is just so tired. No matter what they do, they make no difference. The stupid, useless sheep who call themselves humans berate the Scouting Legion every single time they come back from an expedition. They know nothing, yet they are right, aren’t they? They have learned nothing, and Shiganshina has fallen. How long until Rose and Sina fall? He is tired.


	3. Reunion

_**266387466**_  
Levi is disturbed, and rightfully so. Eren’s “I’ll kill all the Titans” face is hardly one that could be described as pleasant, and certainly the way he steamed in the courtroom wasn’t human. But that isn’t what disturbs him. When he’d first heard Eren, he had thought that his voice was eerily familiar. Levi was a rational man, however, and he dismissed the thought. He had never met Eren in his life. He would definitely remember such passion.

So having dismissed the crazy thought, he is very surprised to hear an unceasing stream of curses as he beats the shit out of Eren. The voice is undeniably the same one he has been hearing since his time in the Underground, and it is also undeniably a voice that belongs to a certain Titan-shifter. He feels just a tiny bit guilty that he has to damage Eren this much. Though judging by the cursing, the beating hasn’t changed much.

Okay, so perhaps he is more than just a “tiny bit” guilty. He is relieved, however, to find that Eren doesn’t hate him. He isn’t used to caring about what others think of him, but he’s never been able to tamp down the part of him that cares about his comrades. A shame, really, but it is what it is. He admits to himself that he’s grateful that Eren is still the happy child he remembers, even if the exuberance now comes with a side of homicidal passion.

 

 

 _ **73264648466**_  
On their way to the Scouting Legion Headquarters, Eren can’t help but look back at Levi. He has so many questions. He didn’t, of course, plan on _Levi_ looking straight at _him_. He jerks back around, his questions still rattling around in his head. Did Levi hear him too? Why had he gone silent for so many years? Eren is elated, honestly, beyond thrilled to be spending time with his childhood hero, but he’s also a little intimidated. Captain Levi is a harsh man, and he has a presence far beyond his short stature. 

Levi orders him to find a way to transform. Eren is crestfallen. He wants to be useful, to humanity and to the Scouting Legion, but especially to Levi. He’s a little shocked, then, to hear Levi say I know you can do it, but not out loud. He still doesn’t understand what is going on. It’s only after transforming, after being threatened by his squad but protected by Levi, that he works up the courage to ask his captain about this weird bond they have. 

He learns that Levi does, in fact, hear Eren, and that he is “very noisy, brat.” He learns that Levi had despaired when Shiganshina fell, because to him it had represented the fall of humanity. He learns that Levi doesn’t really mind Eren, and that he might even be just a little fond of him. He learns, too, that he loves Levi in a way that surpasses simple hero-worship or mere respect. But that last revelation he holds close in the caverns of his own mind. It’s not really something he wants Levi to know. For now, he is the happiest he has been in years, and that is more than enough.


End file.
